Monday, January 24, 2005

Blogblocker 3000!

Our Little Metaphors, and How They Grow
President Bush, you might recall, said in his speech: “After the shipwreck of communism came years of relative quiet, years of repose, years of sabbatical - and then there came a day of fire.” Meaning 9/11.

So he came to the conclusion: “The best hope for peace in our world is the expansion of freedom in all the world…. So it is the policy of the United States to seek and support the growth of democratic movements and institutions in every nation and culture, with the ultimate goal of ending tyranny in our world.”

Finally, he said, not mentioning Iraq by name, “…we have lit a fire as well - a fire in the minds of men. It warms those who feel its power, it burns those who fight its progress, and one day this untamed fire of freedom will reach the darkest corners of our world.”

That was a pretty neat rhetorical trope: the fire of terrorism shifting into the fire of democracy.
Of course, right on the heels of President Bush’s inaugural address, terrorist honcho Abu Musab Zarqawi declared war on democracy in Iraq "and all those who seek to enact it."

So I guess we’ll see whose fire is fighting whose.

Live fearlessly.
Addressing the Knights of Columbus in Baton Rouge, Supreme Court Justine Antonin Scalia told the assembled Catholics (he is one himself), "God assumed from the beginning that the wise of the world would view Christians as fools ... and he has not been disappointed."

He went on to say, "If I have brought any message today, it is this: Have the courage to have your wisdom regarded as stupidity. Be fools for Christ. And have the courage to suffer the contempt of the sophisticated world."

He did jump off the Christian-as-idiot trope long enough to allow that "intellect and reason need not be laid aside for religion. It is not irrational to accept the testimony of eyewitnesses who had nothing to gain. There is something wrong with rejecting a priori the existence of miracles."

As I understand “a priori,” it refers to a conclusion or argument based on reason alone, outside experience. How can the existence of a miracle be knowable outside of experiencing it directly? You can’t conclude from a premise that a miracle WILL occur. That doesn’t make any sense. Idiot.

The course of true love…
Speaking of idiots, AP informed me that a thief in Delaware, one of two men who robbed a Domino’s Pizza deliverywoman in New Castle, then called her on a cell phone to apologize and ask her for a date. She declined, and gave his number to the police.

“Why didn’t I think of that?” I thought, slapping myself on the forehead.
The dotcom days refuse to die. A Nebraska web-page designer auctioned his forehead on e-Bay as an advertising space. He will receive $37,375 to advertise SnoreStop, a snoring remedy, for a month.


Blogger Justin said...

You know, ever since this DVD came out, the link to your guys' biography now redirects me to a DVD page. Now to get to the biography, I have to go to Dr. Science's page and then click on Duck's Breath. But this isn't the same biography that I've known to love and cherish. No. Now, it's just a silly rewritten biography without the audio files. But the most appalling disclusion, though, is the part that says that sometime in the future, you guys might put up video clips. Now its gone! I used to visit that every day dripping with anticipation in hopes that you would put up the clips, and now. . . and now I have nothing to look forward to at the end of the day! YOU TOOK THAT AWAY FROM ME!

btw, I haven't yet purchased the DVD, but I'll soon be getting around to it.

4:36 PM  

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