Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Wednesday's blog....

Tsunami
Perhaps more than a hundred thousand dead, and the earth jolted on its axis, but Jet Li and supermodel Petra Nemcova have survived. Whew.

Don’t get me wrong.
I LOVE Jet Li. And I’m sure Ms. Nemcova is a wonderful person in her own right.

The real news
A man, claiming to have a couple tablesoons of water allegedly sipped by Elvis Presley in 1977, has sold this alleged liquid on eBay for $455. I’ve got some of Johnny Rotten’s spit. Anybody interested?

Questions
Why is it eBay? Why not E-bay, or ebay? What is “bay”-ish about it anyway? People “fishing” for crap? I dunno. It’s one of life’s little mysteries.

Oh, if anybody wants a box full of toys from McDonald’s Happy Meals, make me an offer. Most of them are in the original packaging! And have been spat upon by Johnny Rotten. That’s my personal guarantee!

Found on Yahoo
“Authorities are investigating a mysterious laser beam that was directed into the cockpit of a commercial jet traveling at more than 8,500 feet.”

My question for the FBI: Was there a cat in the cockpit? Cats go nuts over those laser pointers, you know.

Ossuary
I love this word. I always thought it was a special hospital for kangaroo babies (aka joeys), but it turns out that it’s a synonym for fraud. It’s a confusing world.

Speaking of words….
Don’t the words “shaving system” denote “razor?” And when a weatherperson describes “blizzard-like conditions,” doesn’t he or she mean a “blizzard?” Also: is “nature’s fury” a genuine phemenon, or is it just “nature?”

Ducks DVD
Frankly, I’m still devastated by the passing of Jacques Derrida, not to mention the sense of foreboding that the recent tsunami has engendered, but we will be moving forward in 2005, to make sure that each and every one of you will get a copy of the 30th anniversary Duck’s Breath commemorative DVD, whether you want one or not. In the process, we hope to measure the effect global warming is having on retail. Join us, won’t you?

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