Sunday, July 01, 2007

Resonant Blog

Tough questions from Slate
“Since the Die Hard franchise, and its catchphrase, have been absent from the screen for 12 years, a question arises: do the words ‘Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker’ still matter? And why did they resonate in the first place?”

Huh? What? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.

iPhone
Since iPhone has been available for two whole days now, a question arises: does the word “iPhone” still matter? And why did it resonate in the first place?

News from Italy, courtesy of Reuters
A teacher who forced a pupil to write "I am a retard" 100 times was acquitted by an Italian court on Wednesday of abuse charges.

Ann Coulter defends herself for her remarks on John Edwards, kind of
She wrote:

“So for those of you who haven't read any of my five best-selling books: Liberals are driven by Satan and lie constantly.

“Here is my full sentence on ‘Good Morning America,’ which the media deceptively truncated, referring to a joke I told about Edwards six months ago that made liberals cry: ‘But about the same time, you know, Bill Maher was not joking and saying he wished Dick Cheney had been killed in a terrorist attack — so I've learned my lesson: If I'm going to say anything about John Edwards in the future, I'll just wish he had been killed in a terrorist assassination plot.’”

You know, I would like to get Ann Coulter alone in a room, have her stand stock still in the middle of a room, pluck her scrawny arms, and see if she resonates, like a tuning fork. Is that wrong?

Hard news from the New York Times
“Lists have been a reliable staple for magazines and other publications for years, but it wasn't until VH1 polled musicians a decade ago to come up with the '100 Greatest Artists of Rock 'n' Roll' that things really took off on TV.”

Huh? What? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.

Branches
Dick Cheney and his people have tried to sidestep handing over documents to a federal agency charged with their oversight by (a) trying to get the federal agency abolished, and (b) claiming that the federal agency is only charged with documents within the executive branch, and the vice president is not part of that branch, because the veep also presides, occasionally, over the legislative branch; he is therefore exempt. Q.E.D.

Obviously, Dick Cheney belongs to neither branch, but resonates in both. He has no secrets to reveal. He is a phantom, a wraith, a ghost, translucent ectoplasm. He is harmless. Ignore him. He will go away.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Methinks you doth protest too much over Ms. Colter, and not enough of Mr. Cheney.
Someone should hold a contest to guess the number of black dresses in Ms. Colter's wardrobe.
Dick Cheney before he dicks you.
And why is it that the Grand Old Poobahs always having to have a beefy jowled white guy lurking in the background? Kinda like the uncle no one ever gets to know, but he always has a pocket full of cash.

2:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am the Italian kid who wrote the "retard" standards. I learned English over the weekend (and it suits me).

My countrymen have urged me to ask WTF regarding Ms. Coulter. As in, Why does anyone let her near a microphone or personal computer?

Watch the hemline on those black dresses -- soon they will be black shirts.

11:10 AM  

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