Surrender Martha!
Baseball Been Very Good To Me.
When a heckler wouldn’t stop needling Texas Rangers rookie pitcher Doug Brocail about his weight, something broke inside him. He ran screaming towards the stands. His teammate, relief pitcher Frank Francisco, then picked up a folding chair and heaved it at the heckler, clipping him, and hitting his wife on the head, breaking her nose. Francisco was arrested after the game. The heckler, I assume, will not be getting laid tonight.
Vote In Fear.
David Corn, writing for Tom Paine.com, claims that Kerry’s campaign so far “lacks the psychological punch of Bush’s vote-for-me-or-die argument.”
I suggest that Kerry adopt the “vote-for-me-or-I’ll-kill-you argument.”
Because clearly, fear wins votes.
The Induce Act
This little piece of legislation was introduced last June by Orrin Hatch and Patrick Leahy. It would hold companies liable if they make products that encourage customers to infringe copyrights.
This would include DVD and CD burner makers, VHS recorder makers, MP3 player makers, computer companies, and real estate agents, for providing the shelter needed for music lovers to download their illegal products.
Hang on, Martha! We’re all going to jail!
Oh Shut Up.
Dan Rather and CBS have “found a new memo that completely vindicates them.”
It Wasn’t Dangling Chad After All!
From the Washington Post:
Florida neurologist Marc Swerdloff was taken aback when one of his patients with advanced dementia voted in the 2000 presidential election. The man thought it was 1942 and Franklin D. Roosevelt was president. The patient's wife revealed that she had escorted her husband into the booth.
"I said 'Did he pick?' and she said 'No, I picked for him,' " Swerdloff said. "I felt bad. She essentially voted twice" in the Florida election, which gave George W. Bush a 537-vote victory and the White House.
Unfortunate Words In the Media
Fontgate
Girlie Men
Insurgents
Duck DVD
Will contain scenes containing adult situations, language, and pirate violence.
When a heckler wouldn’t stop needling Texas Rangers rookie pitcher Doug Brocail about his weight, something broke inside him. He ran screaming towards the stands. His teammate, relief pitcher Frank Francisco, then picked up a folding chair and heaved it at the heckler, clipping him, and hitting his wife on the head, breaking her nose. Francisco was arrested after the game. The heckler, I assume, will not be getting laid tonight.
Vote In Fear.
David Corn, writing for Tom Paine.com, claims that Kerry’s campaign so far “lacks the psychological punch of Bush’s vote-for-me-or-die argument.”
I suggest that Kerry adopt the “vote-for-me-or-I’ll-kill-you argument.”
Because clearly, fear wins votes.
The Induce Act
This little piece of legislation was introduced last June by Orrin Hatch and Patrick Leahy. It would hold companies liable if they make products that encourage customers to infringe copyrights.
This would include DVD and CD burner makers, VHS recorder makers, MP3 player makers, computer companies, and real estate agents, for providing the shelter needed for music lovers to download their illegal products.
Hang on, Martha! We’re all going to jail!
Oh Shut Up.
Dan Rather and CBS have “found a new memo that completely vindicates them.”
It Wasn’t Dangling Chad After All!
From the Washington Post:
Florida neurologist Marc Swerdloff was taken aback when one of his patients with advanced dementia voted in the 2000 presidential election. The man thought it was 1942 and Franklin D. Roosevelt was president. The patient's wife revealed that she had escorted her husband into the booth.
"I said 'Did he pick?' and she said 'No, I picked for him,' " Swerdloff said. "I felt bad. She essentially voted twice" in the Florida election, which gave George W. Bush a 537-vote victory and the White House.
Unfortunate Words In the Media
Fontgate
Girlie Men
Insurgents
Duck DVD
Will contain scenes containing adult situations, language, and pirate violence.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home