Sunday, August 22, 2004

ROCK LOBSTER

OOPS
From Reuters: “At least $8.8 billion in Iraqi funds that was given to Iraqi ministries by the former U.S.-led authority there cannot be accounted for, according to a draft U.S. audit set for release soon.”

Maybe auditors should check the pockets before they put pants in the washer.

OLYMPICS/GOOGLE
Is anyone buying?

SPIKE LEE…
…has made a movie about lesbians! Dude!

I gather from the reviews that it is accurate in every way to the lesbian lifestyle – at least the lifestyle of those lesbians with baby fever who just can’t get enough sex with men.

SPEAKING OF LESBIANS
Why is it when you go after the President, it’s called “Bush-bashing?” Isn’t that sexist, or something?

OLSENS!
From the Weekly World News: “Clinton has kept an Olsen twins scrapbook for years, has every TV show and movie they've done on video, and even has a secret shrine to them in his Harlem office, according to his friend. . . . How the Olsens will respond to Clinton's overtures is anybody's guess, but if the past is any indication, few women have been able to resist the Clinton charisma."

Why isn’t the New York Times all over this story?

SPAM
I keep getting spam from some outfit called the Christian Dating Service. Do Christians need help in dating? Some kind of divine intervention?

DUCK DVD
Bill, our producer, was gone for a week on a foray to Utah and Nevada with his wife, Margaret, looking for sites of great beauty and alleged Mormon atrocities.

Waiting for feedback, via the miracle of e-mail, on rough cut from the Ducks, and production will resume.

RELEASE THE DOCUMENTS!
Republicans in the Senate recommended dismantling the CIA over the weekend, perhaps to replace it with an organization a little more responsive to the whims of Republicans.

SHE EAT ME
The Associated Press ran a story over the weekend about lobsters, the decline in the east coast population of which is baffling experts.

But the Associated Press also ran a story about a 105 lb. woman who just won a lobster-eating contest in Maine, scarfing down 38 lobsters in 12 minutes.

Well, there’s your problem right there, experts – anorexic women with a crustacean fetish. Keep them out of Maine, and things should get back to normal.

And Spike Lee, there’s your next movie, on a platter, with butter.


1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

DVD
Question? Will you use old footage of shows so we can really get a laugh of what everyone looks like 20 or however many years later? What about that old origional film you guys were in? (Boulder)

9:32 AM  

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