Sunday, May 11, 2008

Lights! Camera! Blog!

Oh dear
Where do we begin? For those of you following my career, well okay, that’s nobody really, but let me tell you I have been working with Bill Allard (and others) on an online web series, whatever that means. We went through a first season, which kind of, well, sucked…. Well , it didn’t suck so much as – how shall I put this? – not encourage interest from viewers.

On the other hand, it wasn’t THAT sucky, and we got funding to pursue a second season, or (more interestingly) the chance to make a DVD of the material.

Unfortunately, one of the actors - disappointed in how the first round of episodes turned out- balked. So I am not flying to Colorado, leading to all sorts of problems, because I need to be in Philadelphia on May 17th to do a Philosophy Talk show in Delaware, and than back up to Burlington to catch my daughter’s graduation from UVM on May 18th.

For a guy who seldom leaves the house, this is pretty heady stuff.

Democrats
Though all the talk about the process of obtaining a Democratic candidate for President being too drawn out annoys me, I must confess I think the process of obtaining a Democratic candidate for President is too drawn out.

I might think differently if journalists - well, you know, how to put this? - SEEMED INTERESTED IN THE FUCKING WORLD AND PURSUED THE “NARRATIVE” ON THAT BASIS, RATHER THAN WHAT OBAMA’S FUCKING PREACHER SAID TEN YEARS AGO THAT MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE BEEN OFFENSIVE, DEPENDING ON WHICH GODDAM “EXPERTS” ARE TROTTED OUT TO COMMENT ON IT…. Oh, sorry, was I yelling?

Barbara Walters
Reading the NYT review of her new memoir, I came across: “She’s old enough to have had the daughter of one of the Three Stooges as a childhood friend.”

But which Stooge, I wonder? Moe? Larry? Shemp? Joe? Curly Joe? Curly Shemp? Shemp Joe? As a result of her childhood experiences, does she know how to poke another person in the eye without causing permanent damage? In private, can she say “nyuck nyuck” convincingly? Why is none of this reflected on THE VIEW?

Hi Def Teevee
Does anybody besides me think there are going to be riots in the streets when the switch to high definition happens? What was Congress thinking? Well, they were probably accepting large sums of money from hi-def enthusiasts. But has Congress ever done this before? Dictated that American citizens must purchase an item, or else?

HD Radio
Don’t get me started on this scam. See Harry Shearer for more on this.

Depressing!
Sorry I have been remiss in visiting my blog. I find it harder and harder to find anything funny in this stupid world.

Newspapers are dying, movies are crappy, my favorite teevee shows have not been the same since the end of the strike, gas is expensive, food prices are going through the roof, Mugabe is insane, Burma is insane, Hillary Clinton is imploding, Bill Clinton is still appearing in public, we’re using stuff we eat to make fuel (THAT’S INSANE!!!), this Useless Damn War, Afghanistan, rampant incompetence EVERYWHERE, including my OWN PERSONAL LIFE…. Oh sorry, I’ll lower my voice. Don’t want to alarm the neighbors.

From a recent Spam email
“Charles Marshall is a comic expert on daily living, because life is crazy and so is he. More than a decade of experience in comedy has given Marshall a quick wit and sharp edge, and his love of God and people has cultured a warm heart. He’s already shared his outrageous insights with thousands through his syndicated column Laughing Matters, as well as entertaining audiences at hundreds of stand-up performances across the nation. Now his versatile and vibrant humor has been collected in this new book. Each of these hilarious sketches gracefully segues into an encouraging and pertinent Christian message, reassuring readers that life may be a zany ride, but God is at the controls.”

In addition, I learned that he is “non-threatening.”

Reuters
Quoting… somebody….
"I think my generation has a lot to answer for because I think the youth culture in the 60s and early 70s threw out every rule book and thought it was really clever to use four letter words. But I think things should go back, not to the old deference, not to groveling, not to any of that but just to feeling respect, because I think that would make everyone's life more pleasant."

Oh, fuck you.

Branson, Missouri
My wife and I picked up a videotape, produced by a credit card company, about the wonders of Branson, Missouri” LIGHTS, CAMERA, BRANSON! The place is kind of amazing – it’s Vegas without the gambling and drinking. Celebrity after celebrity was trotted out – Wayne Newton, Glen Campbell, Tony Orlando, Bobby Vinton, etc. – each of whom has his (or her) own theater. The celebs enthuse about the freedom Branson offers. Because, apparently, the crowds will come to see them no matter what they do, they can do whatever they feel like doing.

There is much talk about authenticity, how Branson represents somehow a real America that is not represented anywhere else. There is much, to my mind, unfeigned gratitude on the part of the celebrities for a place where they can “be themselves.”

But these are people who are deeply inauthentic. They have no life, near as I can tell, beyond the attention of their fans. So Branson seems to offer a closed information loop, in which stars give fans what they want, fans give stars what they want, and everybody goes home fulfilled.

The Wee Bride and I want to go Branson. We are immoderately fascinated by the place.

2 Comments:

Blogger Donal Loch Hinman said...

Depression does have this dampening effect on comedy. There's this twisted argument that it's an essential ingredient for comedy, but people who pose that argument aren't funny. They've never been funny. In fact, they are often depressing. Why? Cuz they're the starch-collars who started the war in Afghanistan, Iraq, TV program execs, death-administering hospital orderlies, and in general folks who set the bar for incompetence.

However, we do get to watch these cerebrally challenged wonders trip over that bar.

So, the alchemy of commiseration has some value in it. Thanks for the yucks.

11:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Charles Marshall spammed, "...life may be a zany ride, but God is at the controls.”

So, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride is allegory, then? Who knew?

-D.E.
(disappointed that there was no MERLE KESSLER THEATER in Branson when I was there last weekend! Jim Stafford just isn't the same!)

4:25 PM  

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