Thursday, December 08, 2005

The Happy Holiday Blog

I said “Merry Christmas,” asshole. What are you gonna do about it?
From Bill O’Reilly’s mouth to God’s ears:

“I am not going to let oppressive, totalitarian, anti-Christian forces in this country diminish and denigrate the holiday and the celebration. I am not going to let it happen. I'm gonna use all the power that I have on radio and television to bring horror into the world of people who are trying to do that. And we have succeeded. You know we've succeeded. They are on the run in corporations, in the media, everywhere. They are on the run, because I will put their face and their name on television, and I will talk about them on the radio if they do it. There is no reason on this earth that all of us cannot celebrate a public holiday devoted to generosity, peace, and love together. There is no reason on the earth that we can't do that. So we are going to do it. And anyone who tries to stop us from doing it is gonna face me.”

And North Dakota is probably available as well.
From the AFP:
“Iran's hardline President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said that if Germany and Austria feel responsible for massacring Jews during World War II, a state of Israel should be established on their soil.”

What a great idea! We know how much Jews just LOVE Germany.

Something else to worry about…
From the AP:
“A new study warns that performing monkeys in Indonesia carry several viruses that could infect humans during the close contact common to street shows.”

I just learned last week that fruit bats may be responsible for the spread of the dread Ebola virus. As soon as I read that, believe me, my fruit bat collection was history. I’m not taking any chances.

My holiday greeting.
Come on everybody, let's put the "s" back in Chritma.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

While I cannot deny the beauty and simplicity of your holiday greeting, one must be careful in applying this to other holidays. For example, taking the “l” out of “Flag Day” could be a little awkward.

Merry Chritma and a Happy Nw Yar.

8:09 PM  
Blogger BonzoGal said...

Bill O'Reilly is like Ed Anger from the Weekly World News- what he says would really piss you off if he wasn't fictional.

9:44 AM  

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