Sunday, July 05, 2009

Blog Go Boom

The Fair
I just got back from the Marin County State Fair. The Dread Wife wanted to go into the Petting Zoo to pet the wallaby. Not getting the pleasure from petting wallabies, goats, deer, or even swine that I once did, I stayed behind, thus affording America's Youth greater and more Petting Opportunities.

While waiting for the Child Bride to Pet, my time was spent (1) aiding a young boy in search of a garbage can by directing him to said receptacle, and (2) aiding an elderly lady in figuring out how to work the hand-washing station by the Petting Zoo (hint: foot pedals).

When my Intimidating Other emerged from the Petting Zoo, and I informed her of my good deeds. She told me that my taking pictures of her petting the wallaby was misinterpreted by a Mom in the Zoo. The Mom was flashing me dirty looks and shielding her daughter with her own body, lest images of the child wind up on the Internets.

I therefore wonder am I the secret hero of the Marin County Fair, or an inadvertent voyeur pedophile? I ate some bleu cheese fries, and a Polish, if that helps.

The Cliffhanger
We stood watching fairgoers indulge in this ride. Towards the end of its duration, a blonde boy, around nine years old I’d judge, vomited mightily, some bits of which sprayed several onlookers at a high velocity. Fun!

In other news…
Speaking of alleged pedophiles, much has been written about Michael Jackson, in the wake of his death, which may turn out to be as weird as he was. A writer I like, James Howard Kunstler, wrote in his blog: “It's fascinating to follow the coverage of Michael Jackson's death, but especially the lavish tributes to his ‘genius’ and general wonderfulness. He was, in fact, a monster, and an apt reflection of America's extreme collective cultural confusion. He was a distillation of the lies America tells itself. He was infantile, grandiose, horrifying, and probably dangerous.”

“A distillation of the lies America tells itself.” Was this a role Jackson chose for himself, or a role thrust upon him? If it’s even true. What, after all, does this mean? What lies? About race? About sexuality? What?

Perhaps Mr. Kunstler should stick to dystopian speculations, and leave the King of Pop alone. He may have been a monster, in the sense that he was unique, and separate from the rest of us, and may even have been a pedophile. I remain unconvinced. His weirdness was the offshoot of a life deprived of childhood, and his talent emerged from that fact.

The nation’s horror of child molestation (despite the prevalence of it) was confounded by Jackson. His popularity did not wane as much as might one might expect. He was not shunned, at least. This may be because Michael Jackson did not want to have sex with seven year olds. Maybe he wanted to be seven years old.

Darwin bashing, from Patrick Buchanan.
He notes the “…publication of ‘The End of Darwinism: And How a Flawed and Disastrous Theory Was Stolen and Sold,’ by Eugene G. Windchy, a splendid little book ....

“That Darwinism has proven ‘disastrous theory’ is indisputable.

"’Karl Marx loved Darwinism,’ writes Windchy. ‘To him, survival of the fittest as the source of progress justified violence in bringing about social and political change, in other words, the revolution.’

"’Darwin suits my purpose,’ Marx wrote.

“Darwin suited Adolf Hitler's purposes, too.

"’Although born to a Catholic family Hitler become a hard-eyed Darwinist who saw life as a constant struggle between the strong and the weak. His Darwinism was so extreme that he thought it would have been better for the world if the Muslims had won the eighth century battle of Tours, which stopped the Arabs' advance into France. Had the Christians lost, (Hitler) reasoned, Germanic people would have acquired a more warlike creed and, because of their natural superiority, would have become the leaders of an Islamic empire.’

“Charles Darwin also suited the purpose of the eugenicists and Herbert Spencer, who preached a survival-of-the-fittest social Darwinism to robber baron industrialists exploiting 19th-century immigrants.”

And this is Darwin’s fault, how? It’s like blaming the Beatles for Charles Manson.

Buchanan writes, “Darwin…stole his theory from Alfred Wallace, who had sent him a ‘completed formal paper on evolution by natural selection.’”

That’s not even remotely true. Darwin did not steal his theory from Wallace. They came up with their theories independently. Wallace’s work did spur Darwin to finally publish ORIGIN OF SPECIES, after years of putting it off. Wallace became one of Darwin’s biggest defenders.

“… Darwinists still have not explained the origin of life, nor have they been able to produce life from non-life.”

And some non-Darwinist HAS explained the origin of life, and produced life from non-life?

Buchanan concludes: “Darwinism is not science. It is faith. Always was.”

This idea that Darwinism is some kind of religious cult is a relatively new trope. Evolution simply means that things change over time. How can you argue with that? And how is that “faith?

More Buchanan
He hosted a conference in June, discussing future Republican strategies to regain a majority. One discussion involved supporting English-only intitiatives. The banner above the English-only adherents misspelled conference as “Conferenece.”

News from the easily offended….
Slate, on the 4th of July: “Then, a bit after 8 p.m., the sun will set. The civilized thing to do at this juncture would be to go home, kick back with a little John Locke, and pass out fast. But, no, we must reckon with the stupid fireworks, an integral part of the Fourth of July since 1777, when they befouled the skies above Boston and Philadelphia. Even if you manage to avoid actually looking at their meaningless nonsense—which is essentially the same nonsense, show after show, year after year—their noise will disturb what should have been a pleasant lack of consciousness. Do we not have an unalienable right to be left alone?”

Pull a pillow over your head, and shut up.

More news from the mysteriously offended
Michael Wolff on Mrs. Sanford, in newser: “Jenny Sanford is haughty, self-righteous, condescending, and an egomaniac….”

Does Mr. Wolff really believe this, or is he just being provocative in the hope that more people might read him?

I received a robo-call the other day. A woman’s voice warned me of a “kitten damage alert.” Alarmed, I listened carefully. It turned out she was talking about a “kidney damage alert.” Thank God! The kittens are safe.

I have chosen to resign as governor of Alaska.


Blogger Blaize said...

Fireworks are evil? People really have got nothing but time, have they?

In the Saddest Letter in the World, which I have reproduced here:, the part that actually chokes me up is the P.S.: "I can hear fireworks, but cant see anything. I think I have lost my Youth. Even Fireworks, no longer fascinate me."

7:36 PM  
Blogger Merle Kessler said...

And did Evelyn ever achieve his/her cherished dream of becoming a court reporter? We shall never know.

7:42 AM  

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